Ryan is home from his three and a half week stint in Florida, and I'm oh-so-happy. It's great to have my buddy back, and it's so comforting to know he's there, even if we aren't together in the same room. I missed his company, missed sleeping next to him, missed hearing him do his things around our little home.
However. I have to confess that this week feels what our first few months of marriage would have been like had we not lived with each other before. In just those few short weeks, I quickly got accustomed to things my way. Now, I'm not saying that my way is the right way. But when you're the only one home for an extended period of time, you can do things whatever way you like. I had the thermostat set where I was comfortable. I ate what I wanted to eat (which meant I barely went to the grocery store, but rather picked at the things I already had on hand). I watched what I wanted to watch. I went where I wanted to go. I turned the lights off if I wasn't in that room. I did all the chores required to keep a house running. I tended to and cared for our babies (ok, dogs) the way I felt was best suited.
Ryan came home this past Saturday, and after I got annoyed at something really petty, I realized I was way too comfortable having things go my way. So these past few days, I've reminded myself that this is a marriage. A team. Both people have to give 100%, not 50/50. So what if a light was left on. Or if he took out the trash on Wednesday morning rather than Tuesday night. What does matter is that he's there, and that his little quirks are what makes him....him. After all, the whole is greater than the sum of its parts and we are just plain better together!
I know my issues have nothing to do with Ryan, and everything to do with me. I'm learning that with marriage, sometimes you just need to let go of the inner control freak or any other idiosyncrasy and roll with the punches. A few short months ago I promised to love this man unconditionally. Gym shorts left on the bathroom floor and all ;)
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